Party in Danbury

I spent the last weekend at Rich's house in CT, which I will spell that way to avoid learning how to actually spell it. It was an obvious rocking time. Rich's family cracks me up, especially because they rag on each other constantly. Rich is one of the top 3 funniest people I know (yes, I rank everyone I know by how funny they are--ask me I'll tell you), and knows exactly how to turn a phrase or even vocalize an oft repeated joke. It amazes me that someone who is functionally illiterate can be so funny. I'm kidding, but for an ESL kid, it ain't bad. Of course, the festivities ran late into the evening as I spiraled deeper into my own personal hell of shame, mendacity, and violent outbursts. Or so I was told. I remember having a great time until I voted to impeach President Nixon, when someone whispered in my ear that not being a member of Congress I don't have that authority, and moreover that Richard Nixon had not been President for over 30 years.

Thanks for a great time, Rich.

Wealth Strategies for Chabillionaires

So far my job is pretty good. I surprisngly don't mind wearing a tie because I think it makes me look distinguished. That and my Selleck mustache. More interesting than helping rich people keep their money at my job is the fact that every time I am in my car on the way back to my house I hear the song "Ridin' Dirty" by Chamillionaire. I really like it, but I can't listen to more than a few minutes because when I'm driving it makes me speed, and dare the NYPD to catch me ridin' dirty.

France, you were robbed today, quel dommage. England, I am putting my hopes on you, so step it up Beckham, Owen and to a lesser extent Ferdinand.